Day 10

Today has been a pretty good day.  I don't think that I have bounced back as much as I did after the first chemo, but today I finally felt pretty well all day.  Good enough to be downstairs and awake all day long.  I am exhausted right now, but I begin to question whether it is still the chemo effects, or the fact that I have been laying around not doing much of anything for what already feels like a long time.  Hhmmm.

As an update, up until today I have continued to feel such a lack of energy.  My stomach has remained cooperative, and that is such a good thing.  Caroline ended up sick on Tuesday night, with a fever and head cold, so she had to stay home on Wednesday.  Thankfully she was able to go back today, but she is still coughing and congested.  I have been trying to avoid getting those germs.  Both kids ended the weekend with stuffy noses, and I don't know whether it was all the close contact with the soccer all weekend, the heat, or who knows?

One new thing is my taste and this strange feeling in my mouth.  For several days I have noticed that I keep getting this weird feeling in my mouth, sort of like there's a skim or thin layer inside my mouth.  It is sort of like when you eat something really tart, and then the inside of your mouth feels "coated" for a few minutes.  It is difficult to describe since it has never happened before.  One common side effect is mouth sores, so I have been on high alert for that, but so far so good.  Staying hydrated is supposed to help with that.  Apparently the chemo affects the cells on our bodies that replicate the fastest (like cancer).  That is part of the reason for the hair loss.  But also, I did not know that the cells on the inside of our mouths completely renew themselves in a 24 hour period.  I think that I am remembering that little fact correctly.  Anyway, I guess it should not be surprising that I am beginning to have some mouth issues.

The mouth coating isn't that big of a deal, but I am not happy about the fact that my sense of taste has been affected.  I just discovered this and confirmed it yesterday.  What a bummer.  I happen to be a person who really appreciates good tasting food, and now, it seems, that is on hold.  I will tell the doctor about it next time, but again, in the big scheme of things.....does this count as a legitimate complaint in the context of cancer and side effects?  I guess not.  So far, all I can tell is that there is a strange after taste when I eat or drink...sort of medicine-like.  I have heard people describe it as metallic, but I am not sure.  I was electrocuted once, and THAT tasted distinctly metallic.  This is in that direction but less so.  And it doesn't seem as though I am getting the full taste of what I am eating.  I had popcorn last night and regardless of how much salt I put on it, it didn't taste salty.  Big boo on that.

Finally...my hair.  What a disaster.  Today especially it felt like a ton came out.  I have patches of nothing and patches of hair.  I guess it is good that we can joke about it.  Chris and I were just saying that it looks like I was bit by a rabid dog, or somehow contracted leprosy.  I am not saying any of that is actually funny, but in the context we used, it made me smile.  At this point, we are both ready for it to finish coming out.  I have had head aches over the last few days, and today was better, but this evening I have one again.  I am not sure, but I relate these to the hair coming out.  Also, my scalp is soooo tender.  It hurts to just lightly touch it.  Again, I am hoping that after this process is complete, that the tenderness resolves and the head aches clear up.  I have never been one to have head aches (thankfully!), so I am a wimp about this pounding.  

The good news is that I do not have the next chemo until NEXT THURSDAY!!  That is a whole week away!  I am glad for this time and the long weekend.  I am so thankful for the way the timing worked out to be able to maximize time with my precious family.  Tomorrow is the home opening high school football game at our new school and there is a tailgate party for new families that I am expecting to be able to attend.  I have still not changed my feeling about R2, but I know I have to make my peace with her and get over myself.  I am looking forward to this new adventure (local football on a Friday night) and to being with the kids as they experience high school football for the first time.  I loved attending our games back in the day, and I hope they think it is fun, too.

In the meantime, I had occasion to spend some time this afternoon reading my Bible, and I was trying to continue where I was last time, but I kept wanting to go back to Psalms and read.  I just love the book of Psalms.  After re-reading my favorite, Psalm 23, I started skipping around, and I came to Psalm 32 and I loved this part:
Therefore let all the faithful pray to you
    while you may be found;
surely the rising of the mighty waters
    will not reach them.
7 You are my hiding place;
    you will protect me from trouble
    and surround me with songs of deliverance.

Good night friends!  And sweet dreams!