Looking back I can't really believe the plan that we cooked up in the minutes following that phone call from Dr. Fisch. Chris and I knew we needed to keep the Wednesday appointment, but we didn't want this to ruin our beach trip that everyone had been so excited about, especially the kids. We thought we would ask a couple of families from our church community group if they would be interested in coming to stay in the condo with our kiddos while Chris and I ran back to Atlanta for the appointment. Later I was guilt ridden with the fact that we were so brazen to ask that of anyone, but somehow in the moment it made sense. My natural instinct is to "stick with the plan" and the "plan" was to spend the week of July 4th at the beach! The lesson that had been drilled into my head from the Shingles experience - that I am NOT in charge, and that I don't have to UNDERSTAND everything - was quickly forgotten, I guess. I blame a bit of it on shock, too.
So, our wonderful friends, the Jones family, basically dropped everything and drove to SC on Tuesday afternoon, so that Chris and I could return to Atlanta. Our youngest, Jonathan, had since decided that he was not comfortable staying at the beach without us, so he came along also. Once again, so much for MY planning. I felt even worse about the Joneses coming all the way now that only one child was staying, but I had to let it go.
We met Dr. Bill Barber, a breast surgeon, at Piedmont the next day. He had all of the pathology back, and slowly went through all of it with us, making sure we had some basic understanding as he went. There was good news and bad news, as far as cancer goes. The good news is that it seems to have been caught early. The tumor was estimated at 6 mm (or 0.6 cm) and was called Invasive Ductal Carcinoma. The bad news is that it is ER (estrogen) and PR (progesterone) negative, meaning hormone therapy will not work for me. Also, the Her 2/new test came back with a 3+, meaning that my cancer is amplified and is strong. The only good news there is that there is a drug that can help. My Ki-67 test came back at 65% on a scale of 0-100%, so that was another disappointment. That test measures the proliferation rate of the cancer. As the doctor said, thank goodness we caught it early because it is an ugly cancer. So, my initial diagnosis was IDC, Stage 1, grade 3.
We had to decide on a game plan, and I wanted to be very aggressive, so I assumed a mastectomy was the next step. However, the doctor explained that the healing time for a mastectomy is considerably longer than a lumpectomy, and would require a longer wait to begin chemo. Based on the "ugly" kind of cancer I have, it seems chemo is likely, but ultimately we need the oncologist to weigh in on that decision post surgery. The thought of chemo was horrifying. I have seen what it does to people, and while I am, of course, thankful there is ANY drug to help fight cancer, the thought of waging that war was daunting, to say the least. If our circumstances change, we can always go back and do the full mastectomy if that makes sense a little further down the road.
The next step was a full chest MRI. I had that on Tuesday, July 8th, after we returned from the beach for the second time. This time I was a little more prepared, and took a Xanax before the appointment. I knew they would have to give me an IV and pump a bunch of blue dye in me to see what they needed to see. The MRI sees more than the mammo and they wanted to double check both sides to make sure there was only the one lump. I was beyond relieved, and thankful, when the results came back without any false positives (common) and the doctors could see clearly that there was nothing else in there.
That same morning I met with a Piedmont Genetic Counselor, who educated us on some of the breast cancer genes that have been discovered so far. I was recommended for this testing mainly due to my age (young). No one else on either side of my family has had breast cancer, so there remains a mystery as to why this has happened to me at such a young age, in particular. This might be one of those questions to which we simply never get an answer. I had to fill two vials with saliva (gross!), but again, just so thankful no more blood was needed. We have to wait 2-3 weeks for results. If any of these were to come back positive, that would definitely affect the decision about future surgery, since usually those genes increase your chances for recurrence. Also, the presence of these genes generally increase your chances of getting a new, different kind of cancer, depending on the gene found. Obviously, our fervent prayer is for this test to come back negative. It breaks my heart that already what has happened to me might affect Caroline's chances, but to have a bad gene would be so much worse.
The next step will be surgery on Friday, July 11th. All we can do is wait, and pray, that the doctors get everything. I know I already have a bunch of prayer warriors joining in this plea, and that is comforting. We are also thankful that Dr. Barber was able to schedule the surgery so quickly, so that I will have time to heal before our much anticipated Yellowstone trip.
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